You Are Standing Before a Small Brick Building

I'm Jonathan and I'm a pretty lousy guy. I have many failures to attribute to my general incompetence. This bothers me a lot. For some time I refused to believe that it had anything to do with my capabilities, choosing to instead blame my decisions or something that I could have easily changed. Part of this had to do with the general disbelief by those around me that I should fail at what they would consider trivial. Another part had to do with the general belief that I am an intelligent and capable person. It took a while, but after seeing the repeating patterns of my failures, despite my efforts to change them, I realized that these were real faults that I would be struggling with for a long time.

So I'm currently a basement-dweller. I have no job and few obligations. I also have a neckbeard. I decided to stop cutting my hair out of disgust for my pessimum lifestyle. All that leaves me plenty of time for my favorite pass-times.

I'm very interested in games. I'm not much of a gamer, but I enjoy exploring new games and learning their history. This goes back to my childhood. My first experience with video games were arcades. I pretended to play them and thought how cool they looked. Later I got a Super Nintendo and played and beat Super Mario World, Zelda: A Link to the Past, and Donkey Kong Country. I didn't get any new games until my parents bought me a Playstation and a bunch of games from a friend of my sister who needed money. The Playstation was way cool in my mind. Though the games were entertaining, I never felt compelled to master them. I would simply play them for a while, see all the cool things that I could do, and quit after coming to a boss that gave me a lot of problems. I believe RPGs were the only Playstation games that I beat. Final Fantasy VII was my first RPG since I played my dad's Pool of Radiance for DOS. I now see it as a flawed game, but I thought very highly of it at the time. Shortly after came Diablo. A friend of my dad coerced him to buy a computer and Diablo. We then began fighting eachother until two in the morning to use the computer. The internet brought a new dimension to an otherwise dull game. Instead of a monotonous dungeon crawl, we were systematically clearing levels and chatting with a party of real people. That led me to the world of online games. I explored many different types of games, from telnet to browser to 2D to 3D. I became involved with communities and eventually resigned to hanging around forums. When World of Warcraft came out I had already been addicted to MMOs, so I passed it up. I've now lost contact with everyone and am not very involved in online gaming. The point, though, is that I've always been a pretty casual gamer who was more interested in the implications of a game than playing through it.

Now I want to make games. I guess I've always been interested in making games. I've always not been very successful as well. I'm a decent programmer and fully capable of realizing my plans. The trick is coming up with a concept that I like for more than a week.